The Newsies in Prank War!
by Anjion
Summary: What happens when you put three friends from Aladdin the Musical, two crazy fangirl authors and a group of musical Newsies in one place? Read on to find out! WARNING: Extreme hilarity and mayhem within!


**By Biankies and Anjion**

 **A/N: This is a collaboration between me and my good friend, Biankies, and is a tribute to the cast of Newsies (specifically those from the original Broadway cast), our favourite Crutchie, as played by the thoroughly gorgeous Andrew Keenan-Bolger, and of course Romeo, played by the ever cute Andy Richardson!**

 **Disclaimer: We don't own any of the characters except Mac, Lacey and ourselves. Please read and review!**

 **AA/N: Mac and Lacey are Newsies. Mac is the doctor to her friends and Lacey is Spot's second-in-command and annoys him mercilessly! Also featuring Pixie, as played by our friend Johanique. Enjoy** **!**

( _It has been a bad day for the Newsies of Manhattan; a day filled with bad headlines, Delanceys and lots of extra papes to sell, and they are more than happy now it is finally over, but none more so than Romeo. He is getting hungry and is making his way towards the Lodging House where the boys' good friends Anjion and Biankies – better known as Stars and Mouse – are preparing a nice home cooked dinner._

 _As he walks along, he hears three unfamiliar voices from a nearby alley..._ )

OMAR: I _told_ you we should have turned left back at the place with the newspapers!

KASSIM: No, you said _right_ and we _went_ right!

BABKAK: Can't we just _ask_ someone already?! I'm starving and Stars said she's gonna make lamb stew!

( _Upon hearing a name he knows, Romeo peers around the corner and sees three young men; one in red, one in blue and one in green_.)

ROMEO: Who are you?

OMAR: ( _ignoring the Newsie_ ) Maybe _he_ can tell us where to go.

KASSIM: ( _turning to Romeo_ ) Hey, do you know how to get to the Duane Street Lodging house?

ROMEO: I'm going that way, I'll take you.

( _A few moments later, at the Lodging House_ )

ANJION: ( _to Biankies_ ) I bet you they've got lost. They should have been here by now!

ROMEO: ( _entering_ ) Hey, I found these three arguing in an alley... ( _He is followed by Babkak, Omar and Kassim, who are bickering._ )

ANJION: Oh, _there_ you are, boys! We were wondering where you were!

OMAR: It was Kassim's fault, he kept telling me to go the wrong way!

KASSIM: No, _you_ lost the directions that Mouse gave you, and then Babkak just _had_ to steal that fancy sausage and get us _chased_...

BABKAK: Hey! It wasn't _my_ fault...

BIANKIES: ( _p_ _utting a cake in the oven_ ) Guys, quit that fighting or you won't get dessert! The only thing that matters is that you're here.

ALBERT: ( _eyeing the cake_ ) We should have those two over more often.

RACE: Yeah, we can actually _eat_ what _they_ cook...

( _A loud crash is heard as someone slams the front door, and a furious looking Spot arrives in the kitchen a moment later_. _Jack, who was standing right behind the door, sinks softly to the ground, unconscious._ )

SPOT: ( _bellowing_ ) LACEY!

( _Everyone stares at the soaking Spot, who is seething. Lacey smirks to herself._ )

LACEY: ( _innocently_ ) Yes, Spot?

SPOT: ( _still shouting_ ) I _told_ you _not_ to put banana skins on the pier! You _know_ I hate gettin' wet!

( _He looks to Anjion and Biankies for support but they just raise an eyebrow in perfect unison and Spot knows he's already beaten. He sits down and sulks_.)

SPOT: Some help _you_ are...

( _Meanwhile, Omar has been looking curiously around him and spots Specs' favourite book lying open. What he_ doesn't _see is the glass of water right next to it until it is too late.._.)

SPECS: NOOOOOO!

OMAR: ( _nervously_ ) Oops... S-sorry...

SPECS: ( _absolutely furious_ ) YOU RUINED MY BOOK!

BIANKIES: ( _leaning closer to Anjion, Lacey and Mac_ ) Here we go. Stars, get the tissues and mop ready...

OMAR: ( _sniffling_ ) I said I was sorry.

KASSIM: Not _again_. ( _He glares at a snickering Race_ ) Omar, stop crying!

DAVEY: ( _frowning at Omar_ ) Don't worry about it. I have a copy I can give Specs.

( _He goes off_ , _Specs calms down and all is well._..)

DAVEY: ( _returning with the copy of the book_ ) Hey, Specs, here's the book!

( _Specs takes the book with a big grin and holds it to him.  
And then disaster happens. A random gust of wind blows the door open with a crash, causing Elmer, who is right beside it, to jump violently and leap onto the nearest person, who happens to be Omar. Omar, startled, tries to bolt but merely ends up shoving Kassim into Specs, who lets go of the book...which lands in the blazing fire._)

SPECS: ( _in anguish_ ) NOOOOooooo...

DAVEY: ( _coldly, to Kassim_ ) That was my only copy.

KASSIM: ( _as other angry Newsies advance_ ) Hey, it was an accident...

LES: Hey! It wasn't _his_ fault! It was Elmer!

( _Spot immediately grabs Elmer and raises a fist_.)

ELMER: It w-wasn't me! Omar pushed him!

( _Omar is cornered by JoJo and Albert._ )

CRUTCHIE: Guys! No fighting! Jack wouldn't like it, you know.

RACE: Crutchie's right! There's only one way to solve this! I propose...a Prank War!

CRUTCHIE: NO!

EVERYONE ELSE: ( _drowning him out_ ) YES!

RACE: Then let's get started...

BIANKIES AND ANJION: WAIT!

( _We race around the kitchen to make it prank proof and set up timers to make sure our food doesn't burn while we're busy..._ )

OMAR: Are you done yet?!

BIANKIES: ( _coming out of the kitchen after Anjion and closing the door_ ) Okay, _now_ you can start.

DAVEY: Okay, guys, let's split up into teams... Mac, Lacey, why do you look so pleased with yourselves?

MAC: No reason.

LACEY: Don't mind us...

( _Davey shrugs and turns away, and as soon as he does, the girls whip a pair of custard pies from behind their backs and charge. Mac gets Race and Davey, and Lacey gets Specs and Spot! And suddenly the war has begun in earnest!_ )

BIANKIES: Lacey, Mac, those had better not be the ones Stars and I made for the dessert!

LACEY AND MAC: ( _looking a little guilty_ ) Maybe...

( _Spot, Davey, Specs and Race chase the laughing girls outside. Albert looks craftily sideways at Finch, then snatches Finch's hat and makes a break for it_.)

FINCH: Hey! Bring that back!

ALBERT: Come and catch me!

( _And he dashes off with Finch and the other boys in hot pursuit..._ )

( _Biankies and Anjion each grab their timers before following the boys outside..._ )

BIANKIES: Hey, Stars, how about we go get Lacey and Mac to help us pull a little trick on Spot?

SPECS: ( _running towards us with a stranger in tow_ ) Hey Mouse! Stars! Wait up!

( _Biankies and Anjion share a nervous look as they slow down slightly to let the two newcomers catch up..._ )

ANJION: Hey, Specs, who's your friend?

SPECS: ( _puffing slightly_ ) This is Pixie. She just helped me escape from Spot; he's in a _really_ bad mood.

( _Pixie waves nervously_.)

ANJION: Well, anyone who can outwit Spot and live to tell the tale is welcome to join us. We're just off to play a trick on him now.

MAC AND LACEY: ( _suddenly appearing round the corner, giggling_ ) Ooh, can we help?

BIANKIES: ( _grinning evilly with Anjion_ ) Sure. We're gonna need all the help we can get for this one...

SPECS AND PIXIE: We're in.

( _Biankies and Anjion pull everyone in closer as they explain the plan with Cheshire cat grins_...)

MAC: So where is this warehouse?

ANJION: Well -

( _She is interrupted by a loud yell from nearby; it sounds like Race. She raises a questioning eyebrow at Mac and Lacey_.)

MAC: Oh, we just set a little trap for Race. We'll have to run very fast when we rejoin the chase!

ANJION: OK. So, Pixie, Specs, you go with Mouse and do exactly what she tells you. Mac, Lacey, you come with me...

BIANKIES: ( _as soon as everything is set up_ ) Now remember what to do...

( _A moment later Anjion, Mac and Lacey come running into the warehouse with an angry Spot Conlon right on their heels..._ )

SPOT: ( _still glaring at Lacey_ ) What am I doing here exactly...?

SPOOKY VOICE: Leave my home at once!

SPOT: ( _trying to be macho but sounding more nervous_ ) What's going on here?

( _Biankies runs up to him, squeaking and pointing behind him at a book which is floating eerily in the air and coming closer..._ )

SPOT: ( _grabbing Lacey who is still standing close by_ ) RUN!

( _He disappears. As soon as he's gone, Pixie and Specs come out of their hiding places, still laughing_.)

LACEY: That was awesome!

SPECS: Yeah, it was! Good job with that spooky voice, Pixie.

MAC: Yeah, well done Pixie!

( _Outside, voices can suddenly be heard_.)

KASSIM: Quickly, Omar, this way! Before Babkak catches us!

OMAR: ( _giggling_ ) He sure looked funny with that egg on his head...

LACEY: Come on, let's join in! ( _She and Mac disappear_.)

SPECS: Pixie, you come with me. ( _He and Pixie run off_.)

ANJION: Well, Mouse, looks like it's just us again. Come on...

BIANKIES: ( _looking at Anjion with a sly grin_ ) Shall we go watch the fun for a bit? I bet they're getting into all sorts of trouble...

( _As we disappear around the corner, two Newsies appear around another, each carrying a bucket full of bulging water balloons.._.)

RACE: ( _appearing from somewhere and addressing one of the boys_ ) Hey Les, what've you got there?

LES: Water balloons!

ROMEO: We're gonna throw them at whoever comes round that corner next!

SPOT: ( _appearing next to Race_ ) Let us help...

( _They hide. A few moments later_...)

SPECS: Hey, Pixie, this way! I know a way to give Finch the slip...

( _The four boys grin at each other and prepare_...)

( _A moment later Specs and Pixie come around the corner, only to walk into a water balloon ambush!_ )

PIXIE: ( _dripping wet, shivering and glaring at the equally wet Specs_ ) This is the last time we use one of your short cuts, Specs.

RACE: ( _laughing at the pair_ ) Not so tough _now_ are ya, Specs?

SPECS: We'll getcha, Race, just you wait! You too Romeo!

RACE AND ROMEO: Yeah right!

LES: ( _hiding behind Romeo_ ) It's fun being the shortest.

( _Meanwhile_...)

FINCH: Hey Albert, Henry and JoJo are coming this way!

ALBERT: ( _busily tying a knot in something_ ) OK, I'm nearly done... There! Now then...

( _Henry and JoJo come sprinting round the corner, covered in mud._ )

HENRY: Look, there they are!

JOJO: ( _excitedly_ ) LET'S GET 'EM!

( _They charge at the two grinning boys... and fall flat on their faces as they trip over the trip wire. Albert and Finch run off laughing, unaware that two girls are waiting for them not that far away._..)

( _As soon as the two boys are out in the open, Mac and Lacey pop up from their hiding places, holding water guns._..)

LACEY: ( _grinning at the nervous looking boys_ ) Ready Mac?

MAC: ( _also grinning like the Cheshire cat_ ) Ready.

LACEY: Then Fire!

( _The girls start squirting the boys with a pungent smelling liquid, while two sneaky authors watch from a safe spot..._ )

BIANKIES: Vinegar on their clothes... Classic. They'll be smelling like a fish and chips factory all day.

ANJION: Ha ha, we'll have to get those girls back, won't we?

( _Meanwhile..._ )

BUTTONS: ( _cautiously_ ) Elmer? Elmer, I saw you come this way. Elmer? Where are you?

( _Suddenly, a bucket of water is upended over his head and he yells blue murder, while a laughing Elmer descends from the roof and runs, pursued by Buttons.._.)

( _Elmer and Buttons make their way through the streets and around the corner where they run into Romeo and Les, who are running away from Specs and Pixie, who are wearing spooky costumes. The smaller boys easily dodge them, only to be covered in blue paint by Sniper, who is hiding on a fire escape_.)

CRUTCHIE: ( _desperately trying to dodge pranks and restore the order_ ) Specs, Pixie, quit chasing 'em! Sniper, don't! Fellas, _listen_ ta me! Jack left me in charge!

( _Everyone ignores him and dashes away in all directions._ )

CRUTCHIE: Guys, this ain't funny! You know I can't keep up!

TOMMY BOY: ( _zooming down the hill in a runaway cart_ ) CRUTCHIE, LOOK OUT!

( _He somehow manages to grab the boy onto the cart before it runs him over, and they both yell as the thing speeds onwards._ )

CRUTCHIE: TOO FAST, TOO FAAAAAAAAST!

BIANKIES: Well, _that_ was interesting. Poor Crutchie...

( _Just then, a cry for help can be heard from down the street._..)

ANJION: ( _looking at Biankies_ ) Someone needs help, Mouse. Shall we go see?

( _Biankies nods and we hurry towards the sound, soon joined by Specs and Pixie. But there is no sign of anyone..._ )

SPECS: Huh? Where are they?

( _Our answer comes soon enough when we are pelted with rotten eggs! We have walked straight into an ambush set up by Mike and Ike, the twins!_ )

BIANKIES, ANJION, PIXIE AND SPECS: HEY!

( _We all chase after them..._ )

BIANKIES: ( _still slightly angry_ ) We gotta _do_ something...

( _Anjion just shakes her head giving the famous 'not gonna happen' look_.)

BIANKIES: ( _pouting slightly_ ) Fine...

PIXIE: Can we get rid of these eggs now?

SPOT: ( _popping up again with Race, Les and Romeo_ ) That's our cue!

ROMEO: Get 'em!

( _The boys start throwing their ice cold water balloons at the four of us._ )

ANJION: GRRR!

( _She grabs one of the balloons and hurls it at Romeo, soaking him, and he squeals. His next shot is diverted and he hits Spot instead of Biankies, and soon all 8 of us are having a massive water balloon fight!_ )

( _Then an ink-splattered Davey rushes by, chased by Mac and Lacey, who are still wielding waterguns, this time filled with pilfered ink._..)

DAVEY: Help!

( _A dizzy Crutchie staggers onto the scene_.)

CRUTCHIE: Guys, stop this at once!

( _He staggers off again._ )

SPECS: ( _looking after Crutchie_ ) Come on Pixie, lets go help.

Pixie: ( _glaring at Spot and throwing one last water balloon at him_ ) Yeah.

( _The two of them follow Crutchie down the street as a large crash is heard in the alley to our left.._. _The sudden noise has all four boys and the ever cowardly Biankies jumping behind Anjion._..)

ANJION: Wow! They didn't jump _on_ me this ti-

( _A squealing Omar comes hurtling out of the alley and barrels straight into Anjion. He is followed by two strange hairy creatures with huge fangs!_ )

ANJION: Owww... Kassim, Babkak, did you borrow those from Medda?

KASSIM: ( _removing his fluffy head_ ) How did you know it was me?

( _Babkak also removes_ his _head._ )

ANJION: I just know... Omar, get off!

BIANKIES: ( _to Anjion, looking like a lost toddler_ ) But you said that you'd send me to Brooklyn if _I_ ever jumped on you again...

SPOT: ( _glaring threateningly at Biankies and Anjion_ ) What's wrong with Brooklyn?

BIANKIES: ( _still looking upset, pointing at Anjion_ ) _She_ said its the worst place ever. She said that the Newsies there are just mean and rude and I'd best stay in Manhattan.

( _Spot growls and takes a step closer to Anjion, who runs away with Spot right behind her._..)

BIANKIES: ( _smirking and giving Omar a high five_ ) Good job, boys! The three of you really earned that extra slice of cake...

( _Anjion runs as fast as possible, leading Spot towards the docks. She rushes towards the water's edge, then shies away at the last moment. But Spot, who seems to fall for this every time, cannot stop and plunges head first into the river. Anjion flees, pausing only to grab up a bucket of ice._..)

ANJION: Hey Mouse, I'm coming...

( _Anjion runs up behind her unsuspecting friend and tips the ice down her neck._..)

( _Biankies squeaks and jumps around awkwardly, bumping into everyone_...)

BIANKIES: That was _cold_ , Stars! Literally...

( _Everyone laughs, and then a pair of familiar 'dings' is heard from the pockets of Anjion and Biankies.._.)

ANJION: EVERYBODY, FREEZE!

( _Everyone but Biankies and Anjion literally freeze into unmoving statues._ )

ANJION: ( _to Biankies_ ) Hey, no one said we couldn't use a bit of artistic licence...

( _We run as fast as possible back to the Lodging House, passing a statuesque Crutchie, and manage to save the dinner just in time_.)

ANJION: Hey, I know how to get back at Mac and Lacey... We're gonna need Romeo and Les...

BIANKIES: ( _grinning evilly as she removes cake from the oven and quickly fixes the icing_ ) Keep talking, Starsie, I'm listening...

( _Anjion swiftly outlines the plan and the two girls giggle._ )

ANJION: So, do you know where that huge old tub of gunge has gone? I know that Medda has plenty of glitter... And now we'd better get back and unfreeze everybody.

BIANKIES: That we should. Now, I think I know where to find it.

( _Biankies and Anjion quickly head their own ways to set up their next prank before unfreezing the rest.._.)

( _A little later_ )

ANJION: ( _to the immobile throng_ ) OK guys, you can move again now!

( _Everyone unfreezes and resumes what they were doing, apparently none the wiser._ )

ANJION: ( _to Les and Romeo_ ) Guys, I need you to go tell everyone EXCEPT Mac and Lacey to gather by that old theatre place; you know, the one with the random railings round the roof?

LES AND ROMEO: You got it!

( _They run off and Anjion goes to look for Babkak, Omar and Kassim._ _She soon finds them, unfrozen and arguing._ )

ANJION: Boys, come with me. Mouse and I need your help...

KASSIM: ( _suspiciously_ ) This isn't just so you can prank us, right?

OMAR: Yeah, we never _know_ with you guys.

BIANKIES: Oh, this _is_ about a prank, but it's one we need you guys to _help_ us with.

BABKAK: Can we get more cake for this?

BIANKIES: No, but I'm sure Stars has a few cookies somewhere and I _know_ Pixie has cupcakes.

ANJION: When _don't_ I have cookies? None of you guys are scared of heights, are you?

BABKAK, OMAR AND KASSIM: No...

ANJION: Good, then here's what we want you to do...

( _A short time later, everyone is gathered together. They are all still pranking each other, as instructed... Then Pixie and Specs come dashing round the corner, followed by Mac and Lacey_.)

SPECS: EVERYONE, LOOK OUT!

ANJION: ( _speaking softly into a walkie talkie_ ) Mouse, they're nearly in position...

( _Biankies, who is in the crowd, nudges Spot and begins a countdown... But just as Spot shouts "Now!", Crutchie hobbles up with Jack and stands in_ just _the wrong place_...)

CRUTCHIE: Guys! Please _stop_ all this! Look at all this mess, it's a disgr-

( _And he is cut off as he, Jack, Mac and Lacey are covered in bright purple, glittery slime..._ )

MAC AND LACEY: AAAAGGGH!

JACK: ( _still in shock and spitting out slime_ ) What _is_ this? I think we're havin' dinner, then I get knocked out; when I come round I find no one there, and _now_ I've been slimed!

( _Everyone_ _looks_ _around_ _guiltily_ _and moves to_ _hide_ _behind_ _Anjion_ , _Biankies_ _and_ _Pixie_...)

PIXIE: ( _glaring at Specs who is hiding behind her_ ) Thanks for the help, Specs.

BIANKIES: Get used to it Pixie, they do this every time.

SPOT: ( _hiding near the back_ ) Oh, like _you're_ any better, Mouse!

BIANKIES: True... ( _She joins the rest of the Newsies hiding behind Anjion_...)

ANJION: ( _to Pixie_ ) Looks like it's just you and me against the wrath of Crutchie and Jack...

MUSH: ( _to Jack_ ) We were just trying to avenge the death of Specs' favourite book.

JACK: ( _in disbelief_ ) You mean all this mess is over a _book_?!

( _Nobody answers him, but everyone averts their eyes..._ )

CRUTCHIE: ( _wiping slime out of his eyes with his hand_ ) Yes, well, while you are all out throwing paint at each other, a group of factory boys are eating your dinner. I didn't bother to stop them...

( _There is silence as Crutchie's words sink in and everybody looks at each other. And then._..)

BABKAK: NOOOO!

( _He leaves the roof at an impossible speed and dashes away. A few seconds later, he is followed by a mad stampede of boys (and girls), all trying to be the first back to the Lodging House, and soon Crutchie is the only person left._ )

CRUTCHIE: ( _grinning with satisfaction_ ) Heh heh, _that_ got 'em alright! I win for once!

( _And, still laughing, he sets out for home_.)

( _A little while later, back at the Lodging House_ , _everyone is cleaned up and sitting down, ready to enjoy a nice home cooked dinner.._.)

BIANKIES: ( _smiling mischievously as she heads to the kitchen_ ) Hey Starsie, are you plotting what I'm plotting?

CRUTCHIE AND JACK: ( _overhearing_ ) Don't even _think_ about it!

( _But Anjion returns the look with an equally evil look of her own as she picks up one of the pies made for dessert_...)

BABKAK: Aren't the three of us supposed to get extra cake for helping Mouse?

EVERYONE: Not _now_ Babkak!

* * *

Epilogue

( _At an unspecified place and time._..)

ANJION: So, Andrew, in your opinion, who's the cutest Crutchie?

ANDREW KEENAN-BOLGER: Why, me of course!

MARTY BELEFSKY: No, _I'm_ the cutest! People _love_ me!

ANDREW: No, _I_ am! People cry when I get beaten up and taken to the Refuge!

MARTY: ( _slyly_ ) Well, _I_ was the first _ever_ Crutchy! So _I'm_ the best!

ANDREW: And _I_ originated the role on Broadway! And people think I'm adorable cause I'm so little!

ANDY RICHARDSON AND ZACHARY SAYLE: Hey, what about _us_?

ANDREW AND MARTY: GO AWAY!

( _They go, looking sad._ )

BIANKIES: Don't worry, boys, we love you too.

( _Pixie enters_.)

MARTY: Hey, Pixie, which of us do _you_ think is cuter?

( _Pixie ignores them and instead goes across to Ryan Steele_.)

PIXIE: Actually, I think Ryan is the cutest...

The End.

 **(Sorry, Andrew, we couldn't resist it...)**


End file.
